Ok. I swear that this can not just be me. I’ve been seeing all these ads lately for this new so called “Most Anticipated MMORPG of 2014” called League of Angels and their ads could probably be the most irrelevant little pieces of (apologies for language) shit I’ve ever seen.
The game Leagues of Angels is a 2 1/2-D turn-based browser MMORPG. I found that on the first site I clicked on. Accordingly, it is also apparently the most anticipated MMO of 2014, which is probably completely false. To be honest, it looks more like another copy of Wartune, which, to set the record straight, I have not played at all. I’ve only seen screenshots and they were enough to turn me away from that game. Ok, I can’t stand shitty graphics and I can’t stand 2 1/2 -D games.
But, that’s not my point.
Lately, on many of the sites I’ve been on, I get bothered by this ads on the side of beautifully rendered 3-D teenage girls with the biggest amount of jiggly cleavage a human could possibly have without looking ridiculous all dressed in tight fitting clothing and doing stuff to show off that cleavage. In fact I’ll describe all three ads for those who haven’t seen them yet.
Ad 1: Let’s make unnecessary sexual impressions as we undress for the beach!
This ad has by far been the most frequent and complicated to explain ad I’ve seen so far. It starts out with a close up of a boobalicious girl wearing a pink bikini. The boobs are jiggling around the small ad frame as the girl jumps up and down, though you can’t really tell that she’s actually jumping so you’ll have to make inferences as to what exactly she’s doing (hint hint). And you see little sparkles everywhere. Tell me that’s not hinting at something. Next it switches to a girl taking off her pants.
Ok, they’re at the beach. Nothing special right? But unless you inspect the image closely, (which, yes I’ve done now, but not at first), you’re given the impression that she’s not wearing a bikini bottom, but underwear. And now that means something totally different.
They go on to showing the first girl showing herself off in that sort of manner that clear is trying to turn you on and then you get one more shot of another boobalicious girl in the setting sun. The target audience for this ad is pretty obvious.
Ad 2: Let’s show how jiggly boobs can be when ladies fall to the ground!
The second type of ad I’ve seen seems more fit for the game even though it’s 1. rendered in 3-D instead of 2 1/2 -D and 2. completely irrelevant to the game as well. It’s in some type of castle courtyard and you get close ups of multiple girls on the ground, dressed like warriors. They’re barely holding themselves up and panting for some reason. Then they collapse onto the ground. And guess what?
Huge jiggly boobs.
Wow. What a surprise.
Ad 3: Let’s allow for large boobed girls to jump and dance in their bathing suits on a tennis court.
The last type I’ve only seen maybe 3 times. It’s of a fox-tailed anime girl and one without a tail dancing in a tennis court with revealing bathing suits on. There’s nothing much more to say about this one other than that it’s just as largely irrelevant to the game and focuses just as much on boobs as the others.
Ok. So I’ve spent all this time typing out all these disgusting ads. Why? Because I’m freaking pissed. I’m surfing the internet and I’m getting these disgustingly disturbing ads for a game that had absolutely nothing that do with beaches or tennis courts or especially large boobs and it’s distracting.
So what am I saying? Well, obviously there are a couple things that we can draw conclusion on.
- If you decide to play this game, you will very likely be met with large amounts of perverted men who like to watch boobs jiggle and have been stupid enough to sign up for this game even though nothing in it contains jiggly boobs.
- The creators of this game certainly are not very smart in their antics if they think that all they need to attract attention and get more players for is jiggly boobs.
- Why in the world do they have the game in 2 1/2-D if they can make 3-D ads? Stupid. Simple another way to make yourself look bad.
- This game is going to be repulsive.
So there you go. A rather abnormal and long post from me. I congratulate you if you’ve survived this long. I’m done ranting. It’s your turn now.