Those Flase Writers

No. Flase is not a typo. It means the same thing as false, but we are simply trying to make a point here. Flase writers do not know how to write. I’ve been on lots of writing communities where everyone is nice and besties with everyone else. People on these sites usually can write pretty well, since they’ve got the courage to post their work online to be read and rated. But even so, you can’t help but run into people who absolutely cannot write for their lives but still seemed to be completely immersed in their own writing. Not only so, they don’t realize how horrible their work is. These are the infamous Flase Writers.

1. Breaking Grammar Rules Has Just Gotten More Intense

There’s that saying, “Know the rules before you break the rules.” It’s true that authors sometimes use fragments to make a statement. Or incorrect grammar just to keep the flow. But there’s a bottom line and all rules of basic grammar are always followed (like punctuation and capitalization) with due respect to the reader’s readability. But Flase writers take rule breaking to a whole new level.

The most commonly found is the infamous lowercase “i”.

“i love you” i said.

“i love you too” he said. i smiled a real big smile. i felt to happy.

Please tell me that doesn’t bother you.

There also tends to be lack of spaces after periods making “[…] in the cornfield. Work hard and […]” into “[…] in the cornfield.Work hard and […]”. Nice new word, “cornfield.Work”. There’s no difference between periods and commas. One just looks curlier than the other.

2. Say, Why Does The Teenager Speak Like a Toddler?

Writing dialogue is hard. Writing good dialogue that matched your characters without being corny is even harder. Some Flase writers like using dialogue a lot. And they tend to look like this:

“I am sure you should stop bullying me.” The girl shivered in fright as she stared up at the bullies. They laughed.

“We are sure we should continue bullying me.” The bullies said.

“Please stop. I’m scared of you.”

“Haha. We will never stop! We want you to be scared! That is our goal!” 

If I were to see that in a book. I would burn it on the spot. Seriously.

3. Tell, Don’t Show

They say it’s always better to show than to tell. Saying “The crystal was magical.” is never as good as, “The mysterious crystal emanated a pale blue aura that give it a sense of magic.” It’s an art that’s hard to master and even the best writers have trouble sometimes. But Flase writers never have trouble.

The girl walked across the room. She sat down and talked to the boy. The boy talked back and they had a conversation. Then they ordered a coffee. They were sitting in a coffee shop. The waiter walked over and gave them coffee. The girl looked happy. The boy took a sip of the coffee…

The most simplest example of all these is My Immortal (which was also dubbed the worst fanfiction ever, you’ll agree once you’ve read it).

So, are you Flase?

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